Marital Lessons from the Marriages of Song Hye Kyo, Son Ye Jin, and Other Stars
Initially, many viewers believed that this factor was a common cause behind both the breakdowns and successes of high-profile K-drama couples like Song-Song, Kim Tae Hee, and Hyun Bin - Son Ye Jin. But is that really the case?
It can be said that showbiz is a microcosm of society exposed across various media outlets. Because they are public figures, most stars have to accept the scenario where everything around their lives becomes the center of attention, or even the subject for people to “dissect” and discuss. From careers, dating, marriage, and even to childbirth or divorce, many star couples naturally face a thousand questions of “Why?” – “Why are they so happy?”, “Why did they break up?”
Divorced from Song Hye Kyo for five years, even when he announced his second child with wife Katy, Song Joong Ki was still talked about as having left his first wife because of children. Bi Rain has kept the flame of marriage with Kim Tae Hee so well that seven years after marriage he can still go on TV to talk about loving her like when they first met. Hyun Bin and Son Ye Jin are blissfully happy and quickly had a child together. People believe that the secret to the golden couples’ happy homes is thanks to the sacrifices of Kim Tae Hee and Son Ye Jin and the existence of their little angels. Adding to the story, Lee Byung Hun was forgiven by Lee Min Jung after a cheating scandal because they had a child together. The public suddenly saw children as the “formula” determining the fate of many showbiz marriages. On the surface, it seems that way, but the essence lies in deeper factors.
Children have never been the direct cause, but they are closely related.
Remember last January, Song Joong Ki announced his marriage to former British actress Katy Louise Saunders to the public’s astonishment. But what surprised the audience even more was the news that Katy was already pregnant with their first child before marrying the handsome actor of Korean showbiz. The shocking and controversial detail was that Song Joong Ki declared he had been in love with his current wife for three years at that time, while he had only divorced Song Hye Kyo in 2019. Rumors that the actor married in haste because of pregnancy and remarried because he finally had a child arose from here.
At the time when the Song-Song couple announced their breakup, speculation about their split due to differing views on having children also emerged. Combined with rumors of a “shotgun wedding” with Katy, fans believed that Song Joong Ki really married just to have an heir, not out of true love. In reality, this is a common issue for married couples, and the essence behind “children” is harmony, love, responsibility, and shared viewpoints.
Family values are built and nurtured not only based on the love between two people but also on many other factors such as economy, culture, society, psychology, and viewpoints… The reasons why many couples break up also stem from these factors. According to a comprehensive statistic from Forbes in 2023, there were 689,308 divorces worldwide in 2021, providing a basis for predicting trends in the next three years. Of these, 43% of couples divorced due to a lack of support from both families, 34% fell into the case of infidelity. Additionally, four causes including “harmony,” “existing conflicts,” “sense of responsibility,” and “child-rearing viewpoints” were evenly distributed in the middle, accounting for quite a high percentage from 20-31%.
It can be recognized that the century marriage of Song Joong Ki and Song Hye Kyo was the result of a rushed love, “bearing fruit” after the success of the TV masterpiece Descendants of the Sun. They flaunted their passionate love to the world like a romantic film and then noisily broke up like a marriage drama on the small screen. This can be seen as a hasty and poorly considered decision – a potential factor and easy to lead to future conflicts for many couples. Some in the industry even believe that method acting caused them to fall into the illusion of love, mistaking their feelings in real life as deep and mature as in the film.
In the two years of marriage, both Song Joong Ki and Song Hye Kyo fell into a “hibernation” state of their careers to enjoy the budding love. But in Korea, once married or having children, artists often face career difficulties. This was shared by Song Joong Ki himself after having his first child with his second wife Katy, and actor Song Il Gook also revealed the same on television when talking about his triplets Daehan, Minguk, and Manse. Although their position and popularity remained top-tier, the stagnation in their acting careers led to the scenario where Song Joong Ki and Song Hye Kyo gradually became disillusioned with their fairy-tale marriage. They had difficulty balancing personal life and career, struggling to make decisions.
Following nearly 30 years of Song Hye Kyo’s career, it can be seen that she is a career person, not only passionate about acting but also very ambitious in maintaining her A-list star image. Although she had no film projects during the two years of marriage, she diligently attended fashion events and did advertisements as frequently as before she was married. The public believes that her priority has never been children or family. However, Song Joong Ki viewed these two factors as his life’s principle: “Becoming a father is the most important thing in my life. I have always dreamed of the day I become a father.” The conflict in life perspectives and lifelong goals caused Song Joong Ki and Song Hye Kyo to fall into a stalemate. Additionally, the excessive influence of the husband’s family further exacerbated the irreconcilable rift between the couple. This can be seen from the hostile attitude and disparaging remarks of Song Joong Ki’s family towards Song Hye Kyo after he unilaterally announced the divorce.
While her three ex-lovers Hyun Bin, Lee Byung Hun, and Song Joong Ki are happy with their families, Song Hye Kyo still chooses a joyful single life at 43. This is also why she is always called out by the public whenever her exes have good news. There is nothing wrong with Song Hye Kyo staying single; it’s just that her perspective and way of living are different from her exes.
To present two cases that share similarities with the Song-Song couple in essence but already have children: the youngest K-pop couple Minhwan (F.T. Island) & Yulhee (LABOUM) – divorced after five years of marriage and having three children, and the celebrity couple Lee Dong Gun & Jo Yoon Hee – divorced after three years of marriage and having one child. At first glance, it seems that Minhwan and his wife separated due to conflicts over having more children (Minhwan had a vasectomy out of concern for his wife’s health after cesarean sections, while Yulhee wished to have a fourth child). Lee Dong Gun was reportedly left by his actress wife due to neglecting both her and their child, but the underlying issues still lie in factors such as: shared goals, balance between career and personal life, lack of jobs after marriage, and youthful haste in decision-making.
Minhwan got married at 26 after one year of dating Yulhee, who was already pregnant at 21. Lee Dong Gun hurriedly married Jo Yoon Hee just one month after breaking up with Jiyeon (T-ara), and three months later the couple announced their marriage along with news that Jo Yoon Hee was pregnant. Without delving into rumors about appearance or “shotgun weddings,” the rushed decision to start a family has certainly posed risks for their marriages. Being together for a long time does not guarantee understanding each other fully, but it surely allows a couple to experience all necessary flavors of a relationship. This can serve as preparation for the next step: marriage.
Marital bliss is the result of…
It can be seen that the above-mentioned star couples who divorced all faced communication and harmony issues, lacking common ground. Responsibility towards children, regret over an incomplete family, the thought of sparing children from a broken home… all these are reasons enough for many couples to try to hold on to marriage. But in the end, they cannot find happiness in their old home if they do not resolve conflicts, find common ground, or sacrifice to regain balance.
Not just looking at cases of divorced showbiz couples, considering the happy A-list star couples like Kim Tae Hee – Bi Rain, Hyun Bin – Son Ye Jin, Kwon Sang Woo and runner-up Son Tae Young, or the reconciled couple Lee Min Jung – Lee Byung Hun after a cheating scandal, it can be seen that they all managed to maintain their homes after having at least one child together. But as analyzed above, children have never been the direct cause but are closely related to the status of married couples.
Similar to Song Hye Kyo, both Kim Tae Hee and Son Ye Jin are among the most powerful stars in the Korean entertainment industry. They possess both beauty and status, have a genuine passion for the seventh art, and have ambitions in other fields such as advertising, fashion, beauty, and business. However, after getting married, the audience could clearly see a shift in their career directions.
Almost immediately after their weddings, both Kim Tae Hee (one month) and Son Ye Jin (three months) had good news. They decided to step back to focus on their families, raising children and not rushing to return to showbiz. Instead, they handed over the financial burden and family responsibilities to their husbands, Bi Rain and Hyun Bin. After settling their children, these two stars gradually took on advertising jobs and selective roles, without overworking or having high ambitions, as their financial status was strong enough to maintain their lifestyle. It’s evident that the enduring marriages of these two couples result from sacrifice, unity, and seamless cooperation between spouses to balance their dual lives.
Like their juniors, actor Ji Sung and his actress wife Lee Bo Young shared that throughout their over a decade-long marriage, they always exchanged opinions and took turns nurturing their family. If the wife had a new film project, Ji Sung would take a break to take care of the children, and vice versa. Fans have often seen top star couples like Lee Byung Hun and his wife attending events together, Ji Sung’s family or Kwon Sang Woo’s family appearing on magazine covers to celebrate their wedding anniversaries, and Kim Tae Hee – Bi Rain doing commercials together. This truly is the perfect ending for these celebrity couples: balancing both marital and professional lives.
Speaking of sacrifice, the case of actress Lee Min Jung (from “Boys Over Flowers”) makes the public reflect. After the scandal of Lee Byung Hun’s affair was exposed years ago, she still kept her happy home for their first child. Min Jung did not immediately forgive her husband but tested him over a long period. She only gave him another chance upon seeing his remorseful attitude and clear change. No longer maintaining his previous carefree image, Lee Byung Hun now focuses on building his career globally and nurturing his family, supporting his wife whenever possible.
Besides cases of finding happiness after having children, Kbiz also has several couples who have maintained a sweet marriage for over a decade despite having issues with childbirth. The “beauty icon” couple Han Ga In and actor Yeon Jung Hoon have been fulfilled for 19 years, but only after 11 years of marriage and one miscarriage did they have their first child. Lee Hyori and musician Lee Sang Soon have been married for 11 years but still have no children. Despite this, they inspire all of Asia with their simple happiness.
The similarity between these couples is their simple love and soulmate-like relationship. With many shared interests, similar life views, common voices, and shared goals, they have remained together for over a decade. Despite difficulties with childbirth, Han Ga In – Yeon Jung Hoon, and Lee Hyori – Lee Sang Soon still aim to have a child together. However, luck did not favor Lee Hyori, who gave up after years of effort due to age issues.
Thus, it can be said that the core determinant of a marriage’s fate, though related, does not lie in “having children” but in the spiritual harmony and common voice between husband and wife.
